The 'N' Word, Book 1 Read online

  THE ‘N’ WORD

  Written by Tiana Laveen

  Edited by Natalie G. Owens

  Book Cover: Travis Pennington

  Copyright © 2015 by Tiana Laveen

  Kindle Edition

  All rights reserved.

  The Literary Lion’s Den, LLC

  Warning: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement, including infringement without monetary gain, is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5 (five) years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.

  Names, characters and incidents depicted in this book are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of the author or the publisher.

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

  IN OTHER WORDS: If you steal this author’s work and illegally share it, you are no better than a thief that breaks into someone’s house while you think they are away. You are a criminal. You don’t work for free, so why should writers? IF YOU STEAL, ILLEGALLY SHARE, UPLOAD OR PIRATE OUR LITERARY WORK, YOU SUCK. PERIOD. POINT BLANK. Thank you and goodnight.

  PLEASE NOTE: This book is the FIRST BOOK of a two-part series. (There are two books in this series.)

  1. The ‘N’ Word

  2. Word of Honor

  The book had to be divided due to a high page count. However, the SECOND BOOK, ‘Word of Honor’, is being simultaneously released with ‘The ‘N’ Word’. Therefore, there is no wait time for the reader and no lingering cliffhanger. Thank you.

  IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR THE READER: A short version (a novella) of this story was written and published in the Cross Climax series, written by Tiana Laveen in 2009 and published in 2010. That story appeared in, ‘Cross Climax II’, entitled, ‘The ‘N’ Word’. If you purchased that book and read that particular story, please note that though the premise is the same, this full-length novel tackles the subject in a much more in depth manner and there are MANY changes that essentially make this far more than a revamp of the original story. This book is significantly longer due to there being extensive character development, changes in many of the original details, background information, flushed out scenes, many added scenes, etc. Therefore, it will be a different experience from beginning to end.

  Synopsis

  They say there are two sides to a story. And two sides to every man… Aaron Pike is one of those men. Aaron is a white nationalist, a Commander in the organization and Nazi who grew up in Frisco City and Gordon, Alabama. He considers himself an activist and purist for the white race in America and offers no pretenses or excuses for his controversial views, affiliations, machinations, and sometimes violent behavior. Despite the common theory or belief that the majority of white supremacists are void of any aptitude and acumen, Aaron is not only intelligent, but also sometimes charming, witty, and funny. He has the power to disturb and fluster with merely a look. Much to no one’s surprise, including his own, he ends up in the prison system, serving a stint for beating a man nearly to death in what is perceived as a racially driven assault.

  While serving his term, the recidivist Aaron believes as he’s always done that he will serve his time and be right back out on the front lines of the movement. However, fate ushers him down a different path altogether…

  A new prison psychiatrist is assigned to Holman Correctional Facility, and Mr. Pike is forced to delve deep and discuss in detail situations regarding not only his tumultuous past, but his not so clear future. …And the future holds a strong desire to meet a woman he is not only compatible with but one he is determined to make his wife…

  Mia Armstrong is an elementary schoolteacher from a conservative, Christian background. She also volunteers at the prison, and is asked to help spread the word about a prison pen pal program. In that process, she runs into Aaron, and before long, the two hit it off. Only there is one problem… Mia Armstrong is African American. The two forge an alliance and that friendship flourishes into pure, unadulterated love.

  How will Aaron deal with the truth of his feelings? Can he force himself to hate a woman he adores and loves based on her race alone? Will Mia be able to stay by his side after discovering the darker edge of the man she’s fallen helplessly in love with? Will she be able to offer forgiveness and redemption or will she turn her back on a lost soul who is used to not giving love, or receiving it? Step inside of this explosive novel, ‘The ‘N’ Word’, to find out how this story of unlikely love unfolds.

  Warning

  Please be advised that this novel delves into topics of an adult nature.

  Though this is a love story in every sense of the word, this book covers a gamut of topics that some readers may find objectionable.

  These include but are not limited to:

  1. Race, racism, hate groups/supremacy beliefs

  2. Abuse – emotional and mental. Neglect. Domestic physical violence.

  3. Addiction – Gambling addiction, excessive drinking and drug usage

  4. Realistic language, which means there are gratuitous profanity in dialogue, bigoted mantras, xenophobia, and racial slurs.

  5. Graphic /sensual lovemaking scenes

  6. Explicit violence

  7. Descriptions of states of economic deprivation

  8. Mental illness and personality disorders

  If ANY of these topics are one(s) that you wish to avoid at this current time, please be advised. Thank you.

  A page torn out of the book of life

  During the writing of this novel, we as a nation have been once again touched by the short and long arm of racism. A fraternity, SAE, the chapter in question located in Oklahoma, has gone down in KKK burning cross flames due to a racist chant verbally depicting ‘niggers hanging from trees, but never being a part of the SAE.’ The house mother, Beauton Gilbow, expressed her dismay of her ‘bad boys’, even growing teary eyed as she sat with an African American reporter about the incident, but those tears were for herself and not genuine. She was more concerned about not having a place to live versus what truly transpired—for after her heart-felt, emotional ‘throw my sons under the bus’ interview, footage was found of her saying the ‘N’ word herself, over five times in a row to be exact, while a rap song played loudly in the background.

  She was laughing it up while lounging happily on a couch. In other news, the Ferguson Police Department has been found guilty of violating the rights of African Americans according to the Justice Department; and, an added cherry to the racist, blood drenched sundae, is that an African American man, Walter Scott, was shot dead in the back after officer Michael Slager in South Carolina lied and told dispatch that the man reached for his weapon. Footage taken by a passerby clearly showed that the victim had done no such thing. While finishing the novel, the news was set ablaze when an alleged madman, obsessed with ‘black and white’ race issues, walked into a South Carolina church during bible study and executed 9 black parishioners with not a hint of remorse.

  And here we stand, America, after numerous complaints, shootings, murders, and unjust arrests have been made regarding Africans and African Americans. Here we are, in year 2015, still dealing with the same ol’ bullshit…

  I wish to salute the freedom fighters of the past and present, people of all races and ethnicities. I wish to offer a firm ‘thank you’ to the people who don’t give diddlysquat about the limelight, but know everything about doing what’s right.

  WE SALUTE
YOU.

  Dedication

  This book is dedicated to Kim Wright Barnum.

  She is the ‘den mother’ for the Laveen Lair, my online readers group. She works from sunrise to sunset in there, engaging readers, sharing my updates, posting interesting information and keeping the flame lit as we collectively encourage women to embrace their inner Goddess, believe in themselves, and never settle for less than they deserve. She has been an avid reader of mine for years, a relentless cheerleader, and has given me solid advice regarding my work. Kim is a rarity, the type of person an author dreams of having in his or her camp. You seldom have to ask her for assistance; she simply does it—because she believes in YOU and your brand.

  When I’ve wanted to throw up deuce signs due to feeling disenchanted, she’s talked me down from the cliff.

  When I wanted to bounce off an idea, no matter how odd, she offered a listening ear.

  When I wanted to vent, she’d simply allow it, no matter how nonsensical my rant may have sounded.

  Thank you Kim for your work, efforts, and continued support. Thank you for assisting me in my career, which is my passion, and for helping other authors like me, who don’t want to be put in a box, tight-cast or labeled. We simply want to write, invite positivity into our realm and encourage people from all walks of life and backgrounds to sit back and read.

  You are a friend, an eccentric lover of words, hilarious, intelligent, wise, and all around wonderful person.

  Thank you.

  You are loved.

  Tiana

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Synopsis

  Warning

  Author’s Note

  Dedication

  To the Reader

  A Word from Our Hero

  Preface

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Author Biography

  To the Reader

  Greetings! Thank you so much for purchasing, “The ‘N’ Word.” My name is Tiana Laveen, and if you’ve made it past the synopsis and crooked warning signs; rusty pipe bombs; deranged, hissing cats; cracked, lopsided sidewalks confirming your many years of bad luck; smelly ointments stuffed in sashes tied to the necks of blood tinged voodoo dolls; falling broken shards of crystal from the glass ceiling; Hazmat suit fitted crowds; pint-sized killer clowns with black and yellow wasp colored poisonous cotton candy; and the odd fellow who is following closely behind you with nothing but hollows for eyes and a bloody sliced grin—then that means not only that you’re not afraid to hitch a ride with me, but that not a single f**k was given on your part to cease this trip at once and you actually trust me to make this read worth your while!

  That’s a lot of responsibility to put on my shoulders, but hey, I am willing to give it my all nevertheless. Now, for those of you that read my series, Cross Climax (that is, the anthologies Cross Climax I and Cross Climax II) then you are already familiar with the idea of this story. As stated earlier, this is not what I consider the same story and what I mean by that is I have almost started from scratch, but used the original premise/theme/outline. I appreciate everyone who has read Cross Climax I and II and expressed sentiments of enjoying them. I must be honest, however. I re-read this story for the first time in over four years, and I am in shock at my lack of character development and depth in the original version of this particular story. I know that it was an anthology story/novella/short read, so I will give myself a TINY shred of forgiveness and there was also a learning curve I had to quickly delve into, but for a story with such a serious subject matter, there is no way I could find the original version remotely close to acceptable under my current parameters relating to deep, quality storytelling.

  I had many thoughts and story ideas at the time, and still do; yet, sometimes, my execution of those concepts during the ‘early years’ did not match how I saw the themes in my head, and unfortunately, I believe this was one of those cases. For these reasons, I honestly could barely get through my read of the original story. Not because I think it is God-awful, but the grammatical issues abound (a friend was doing my editing and, though I appreciate the efforts, I needed to hire a professional to do this task). Not only that; there were so many missed opportunities to really flesh these characters out and make them three-dimensional. In other words, the story had good bones, but was starving to death. Hence, here we are…

  You are about to read, “The ‘N’ Word” for the first time, even if you read the novella in the series. Part of the reason is because I took a little vote. You see, there is an online readers group comprised of over 230 women who, for whatever reason, kinda dig me, and I came to them one day asking if I should re-write this story in a longer version. The overwhelming consensus was ‘YES.’ Some even let me know that it was this very story that led them to my work in the first place, and how this is a tale that always stuck with them. So, I shrugged and plucked the book off my office bookshelf, found the account in question, re-read the thing, and decided to have a go at it. Ironically, half through writing this novel the second time around, an eagle came to perch outside my office window. I’ve never seen an eagle in person before, unless you count my visits at the zoo. At the time, I was sickened, mentally exhausted from doing some of the research required for this book. On that very day of feeling down and out, the eagle landed on a tree branch outside my window.

  He swooped down to try to catch fish in a nearby pond, then he’d sit on the branch once again. I had, in the process, convinced myself that my eyes were playing tricks on me so while he still sat there, I turned away and looked up photos of various eagles… Yes, it was definitely an eagle. Now here is where it is gets eerie: I was also doing additional research regarding Nazi and socialist tattoos, and I just so happened to be studying their highly regarded, ‘Eagle atop the swastika’, which is the Nazi party’s formal symbol. So, as I arrived at an exhaustive point, I was pushed to go further. I took it as a definite sign that this re-write not only needed to be done, but that I was on the right path in regard to how I was deciding to address the story.

  Now, there are many people/potential readers who would scoff at the notion that a white supremacist, covered in heinous, racially charged insignia and salacious tattoos, would ever fall in love with a lovely, somewhat innocent African American school teacher in the south of the United States. On the surface, that would be a fair assessment. Most people reading this I believe may have side-eyed the blurb, for many of the readers of my work are black, and a large percentage of those readers are women. Therefore, it would be a difficult task to love a hero who hated your skin, heritage, and culture.

  I would be asking you to embrace someone who found you reprehensible at the outset, deemed you less intelligent, and believed every negative stereotype about you and ‘your people’ held water. Worst of all, this man is dangerous. His hands are lethal weapons and his mind is even more powerful and twisted. He is wicked, soulless, occasionally not self-aware and spontaneous in regards to violent reactions from his outside environment. Additionally, he does not fall within the typical stereotypes that one may imagine when thinking of a person of his caliber, or lack thereof: hillbilly, redneck or inbred son of a bitch, to name a few. That fact alone makes Aaron all the more treacherous, confusing, and an upsetting entity to an outsider looking in.

  How can someone with such grotesque, antiquated, warped ideologies be
deemed sexy and, more important, redeemable? What type of woman would dare deal with a man so reprehensible and deplorable? Does she lack self-esteem? Is she a fool? Perhaps half of her brain is made of cheap bubble gum and the other half comprised of partially defrosted pepperoni pizza. Surely that would explain it…

  When re-thinking this story, I initially realized that the topic would turn many people off. Only those that were open-minded would put their concerns aside and say, “Okay Tiana, you are really trying me right now…but I liked another book or two of yours, so I’m going to see what you’ve done here, give it a chance.”

  Now, those same readers may get 50% in and say, “Ms. Laveen, you’ve lost your damn mind and I am done.” Or, they may say, “I can not believe I am still reading this, but I have to find out what happens!” Or, even better, they may text a friend: I am reading the ‘N’ Word series by Tiana Laveen. You HAVE to read this!

  Regardless, I hope you can go the distance because I want to show you two people who believe they are polar opposites but find love, companionship, and romance with each other. The disgusting and unlovable becomes ‘crush-worthy’ and the demure becomes a sly vixen and siren of desire.

  So, without further ado, let’s pull back this blood and tear stained curtain, reveal the ugly truth of a dark love story covered in filth and redemption, and let the games begin. Get comfortable… here we go…

  A Word from Our Hero

  My entire upper body is covered in rich, black ink. I’m proud of my tattoos. They aren’t futile, meaningless, trivial bullshit. Everything on me represents a part of who I am as a man—defines, confines and frees me all at once. For example, on one arm, I have a swastika. I have several swastikas actually, but that one is my favorite. On my chest is the Aryan eagle. Its straight wings are extended as its resilient claws grip the Nazi shield. On my left shoulder I have a perfectly drawn, realistic profile portrait of Hitler, and beside it, the Iron Cross.